Thursday, March 31, 2011

Assault with a marshmellow!

This is how bad it is in the UK
The cops are being booted out by the thousands because of budget cuts, but this warranted at least aStg10,000
Investigation!!!

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3503279/Police-quiz-boy-aged-13-over-assault-with-marshmallow.html

Obviously the inbred donuts in Cornwall have nothing else to do.
Evening all!!!

A German who knows what he is talking about!!

Baby twins talking internet hit

I can't get used to Munich working

I have to say it but I still Love Amsterdam and Holland.

Yes the trains are good, but old.
Munich is supposed to be the richest area in Germany, but it seems that they are having problems with the Economic crunch.
Yes the shopping is far better here, but more expensive than Holland.
Flights are more and not as frequent.

I am particularly having problems with a couple of people here who are NOT German.
They are rude and very unhelpful, especially when they are supposed to be helping me on the project.
There isn't as many people speaking English here.
One guy in my team is very helpful, but he is a developer and can't help too much on the planning side.
I don't have resources and yet 2 days ago found out at least 2 people who are essential for the project, but it seems I had to find out myself.

Yes I miss Holland and all my buddies in my old team.
I think I will go back after this contract, which may be shorter than expected.

No Drink Driving problems in Munich

6.30 am this morning I got into a taxi. The driver was smelling of alcohol and belching.
So I am not sure if he had beer for breakfast or not.

Anyway, it appears that there is no problem with drink driving in Munich, just do it!!

Munich calling

Well remember the guy in the office that has had ear muffs on, well he has now changed his tact.
He obviously rides a bike to work.
So he walks around for about 1/2 an hour with his helmet on and his trousers half way up his legs with walking boots on, with the ear muffs.
The he changes.
He wears scholls with white straps on and his trousers still half way up his legs.
He ain't right!!!

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Germany 1 Australia 2

The Hun were beaten by the kangaroos last night !!!
I think first time ever and it was the only football I could see.

I am sure a number of sad faces here today.

I am still laughing hahaha

Hotel not good

Well the hotel has let me down.
No internet and they are waiting for an "professional expert' to get it going.
I am sitting in the bar with no one serving and a group of peasant German workers having dinner that they have brought in, with their alcohol!!
My kitchen doesn"t get cleaned.
So I think ' Asta la vista ' !!!

TMobile and Vodafone are shit in Munich

Well they might be good in the UK but as the 2 main providers in Germany they have a maximum of 7.2 mb speed which actually is less than 3.
So shit for watching streaming.
Plus it's mega expensive.

Pile of shit!!!

Monday, March 28, 2011

EU to ban cars from cities by 2050

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/eu/8411336/EU-to-ban-cars-from-cities-by-2050.html

1. I will be dead
2. I guess they all think something else will come into it like Star trek transporter system
3. The aliens would have taken over
4. Will there be an EU then

Who comes up with this shit in Brussels!!!

England v Ghana: all I need is 100 words of English, claims Italian manager Fabio Capello

'Billy No Mates' from Munich Calling!

At 6.45 am I was the first in the office !!!
Last night another classic.

First of all I dragged back to the apartment 6 bags last night (in a taxi) only to find a bloody shopping area over the road to the hotel which is hidden!!

Then around the corner to the hotel I was told that there was a take away pizza place.

So I went there. I couldn't understand why there was Turks and a Chinese lady there.
Anyway undeterred I ordered a peperoni pizza. Which here is a Margherita (no pineapple) and peperoni.
€6 - luverly jubberly I thought.
Get back to my room. I had a Margherita with Jalapeno peppers!!! What the fuck is that all about!!
So tonight I think I will go just a little bit further where I saw a kebab truck!!!!

Oh then I looked at the very professional menu at the Hotel reception to see that they served Pizza, Chinese and sushi!!! Looking at the place I don't think I will be going back again!!!

My middle son

My son is learning German at school and next week he goes to Cologne.
The first of our kids to go on a school trip.
So to help him I have said he can come and visit me in Munich when some of the family go on their Sun special holiday in July.

So last weekend I treated him to 2 German football magazines.

I asked ' were the magazines any good?'
He replied:
' Don't know they are in a foreign Language!'


Sunday, March 27, 2011

Deja Vu

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/topics/weather/8409452/Britain-set-for-brolly-and-sunblock-summer.html

I wonder if this is re-hash of the same notice a year ago.
Then we got quite a wet summer!!

Jubboes!!! Don't go out and buy your Bar-B-Q yet !!

Let's walk before we can run England!

The papers are all glowing about England's defeat of Wales on Saturday by 2-0.
I have a soft heart for Wales with a Welsh surname, but come on Wales are not a premier side are they!
I am not saying it may have been a different story if Gareth Bale had played, but put it into perspective when you see Brazil or Germany or Holland playing.
Let's get real.
In my view Capello still hasn't got the right brain nor tactics for England.
We will NOT win the European Championship and expect the England team to play boring and so so. Nothing outstanding.
The team is not balanced, they don't play well together unless against a lesser team.

Although a Spurs fan, the quicker Harry can get in there the better. Unfortunately, not until after his kangaroo court hearing that starts in July. Did you know 2 things:
Only 2 managers have been accused of bribery and both have been at Spurs after the fact!
i.e. Gorge Graham was charged and we haven't seen him since. Harry is now at Spurs and no proof yet.

The second thing is that it has been 4 years since Harry's house was bombarded with a bunch of 'gung-Ho' Police at 6am.
Personally I think, That if it's this long, then they have flimsy evidence.
What is worrying is that after I think Stg 10 mio in investigating ALL managers they will fail and have nothing to show for this wizardry.
Pratts spring to mind!

Munich calling

Well today is very misty.
I have my larger room and Kitchenette.
It's still the 1960's style though.
My shower head is all floppy so I had to hold it this morning.
Oh well at least they are a friendly bunch at the hotel.

In the Office at 7am where there were 2 people in before me!

The weekend was a little hectic.
Friday I was home and I started the day with a doctor visit.
Then is was just getting things sorted.
Friends came over on Friday night.

The missus went out with her friends to a
themed night. Can't remember what it was supposed to be.
All I know was that the waiters only had aprons on and the women on Saturday were talking about everywhere they turned they had a bum in their face.
Funny how they talk about other mens bums and not ours!!
Of course they all got shit faced!
I left my missus on the sofa in a comatosed state.
My friend took his missus home who was 3 sheets to the wind as well.
Now they are planning another night out.
See you let them out once a year and then they take liberties and arrange another one in 3 months. WHAT IS THAT ALL ABOUT??

Saturday morning was up at 6.30am for our son to go and represent Essex in football.
Of course we got there 2 hours early!!
The boys played really good football but with only 5 minutes each half, it didn't go too well.
Other people said how well we played, but for this kind of football it was too good and no goals.
They lost 1-0 in the first match from a  dubious free kick Our team is small and the other teams were tall. So a tall bastard headed the ball and in it went.

The next game we should have had 2 clear penalties for handball but the ref was fucking blind!!
Anyway the ball hit the post, bar and any other part that stopped it going in.
One team had a goalie and I am sure he was 14 years old. He was nearly as tall as the bar.
Anyway, the boys enjoyed it and that's all can be asked.

Saturday at 17.00 I had a doze. I then woke up the next morning!!

Yesterday the youngest was in action again. This time the team won 4-1 and my son got man of the match and apparently he hit the ball from half way line and nearly knocked the goalie off his feet.
Unfortunately I wasn't there as I had to sort things out before leaving for Munich.

So back in Germany with the mist and back to work.






Saturday, March 26, 2011

The boys did well

My youngest son's school represented Essex today ina regional finals tournament.
They played excellent football and were commended by many Managers and people.
Unfortunately, luck wan't on their side today.
They hit posts and one of the teams had a goalie who looked as if he was 14 years old (3 years older).
Teams were from Norfolk & Suffolk, East Sussex, Hertforshire, Buckinghamshire, London and Kent.
Anyway, the boys lost their first gaem when the ref gave a free kick and we didn't understand why.Anyway, they had a tall player up front who did a great header and the keeper had no chance.
Apart from that the boys played really well and didn't put a foot wrong.
The ref in one game didn't give us 2 penalties, which were clear handballs.
The boys were upset but all the parents were proud of them and the teacher was as well.
It was a great experience for the boys.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

For PETA sake!!

http://uk.eurosport.yahoo.com/23032011/58/peta-call-ban-cricket-balls.html

So now we have another mad cow group!! They want to ban cows being killed for the leather to make cricket balls.
Obviously the cricket ball is a by product of killing the cow for it's fucking beef!!
The cow is sacred in India and so is Cricket so this must be highly confusing for them.

The best thing to do is to shoot the fucking animal activists and let us get on with living.
What will these people do when there is an apocalypse on Earth.
Die because there is no atmosphere to grow fucking veggies???

Jose Mourinho wants to come back to the Uk

My view is that he can only go to Man City.
Man U still has Ferguson and they don' have the money Jose requires.
The only team that can have the money, the desire is Man City.
Chelsea wouldn' have him back. H ehad a fall out with Abramavich and if he came back he would have more power than Abramavich.
No one else can afford him basically.

So Man City it is.

I like him, he adds character to the game and he is a 'one off' and ' The special One!'

screwed!

Last night I wanted a light'ish meal so i asked the hotel for a local restaurant.
I also mentioned that the Indian next door cost me €35 the night before and she said ' that's a bit expensive'!
Anyway she recommended an Italian up the road and it was at the low end of the cost scale.
So when I get there, it's empty! I am the first person.
So I had a mix of bread and spreading stuff.
Main course consisted of 4 raviolis
I had 2 glasses of wine and a large Cognac.
€48.50 later !!!!
Next week it's McD or Pizza hut!!!
I will have to become an even more fat fucker for cost sake!!!

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

More emancipated than most!

Thought it was odd this morning that I was being looked at. I thought it was beacuse I had a different jacket to my trousers although the same colour.
Having got off the bus and walked through a shopping center there was a breeze.
Of course my flies (zip) was undone !!!
I was lucky I didn' t get a zieg Hiel!!

A plus for Munich

Great food!!!

So far Swine steaks
Mixed grills very succulent
Fantastic Dates and Strawberries all huge

Monday, March 21, 2011

Fucking Krauts!!

I was told that nearly everyone speaks English here.
Well where are they??
Got on a bus this morning and the driver wouldn't take cash, so then he points behind him, where there is a machine.
Of course I don't have a fucking cash card!!!
Fortunately it took coins.
I lady helped me, but it was all in fucking German!!!
I need to listen to my German lessons.
It begins with the  music to the Great Escape!!!Doo doo, da doo da doo doo

German banks are thieving gits!!

I have opened a bank account because I can't get any coffee or food from the bank I work at otherwise.
So today I signed and then was told we will send the card to you next week.
Well of course I don't know where I will be next week.
So they said 'ok we will have it delivered here at the branch'
'Ok then agreed.'
' That will be €15 then please !!!!!'
(Stg 13)

I always thought it was cheaper to get your stuff delivered to the branch and you do all the walking etc.
What a fucking liberty!!!  Postage cents 55 I was mugged by a bank your honour!!!

Gay conversion

Germany calling

Lovely sunshine today but very fresh.
Well the hotel is a throw back from the 60's. 
Brown tiled shower floor, artificial wood all over the place, drab and there is no English TV no news etc. I had to ask for towels this morning. 
There was no trouser press so i had to ask for iron. No tea facilities, no mini bar no fuck all. Won't be going back there!
Internet not working.
That's what I get for 3*

Friday, March 18, 2011

Germany calling

the office is about 25c and it's killing me.
I am dozing off by the afternoon!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Germany calling

So tea in my room in Germany Euro 13.80 (Stg 11.90) what a fucking liberty!!!
Then I just noticed a bottle of water I thought was complimentary is in fact Euro 3.80 (Stg 3.27) for 50cl.
What a fucking Liberty!
Won't be staying with NH Hotels again.
Next week in a smaller hotel and cheaper one.

Tonight I went to the HofBrau haus in Munich
http://translate.google.com/translate?hl=en&sl=de&u=http://www.hofbraeuhaus.de/&ei=b1eCTf6rNJSp4AaX4533CA&sa=X&oi=translate&ct=result&resnum=1&ved=0CB4Q7gEwAA&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dhofbrauhaus%2Bmunich%26hl%3Den%26rlz%3D1G1GGLQ_ENNL316%26prmd%3Divnscm

Had a lovely schwein steak with crackiling and 2 dumplings.
The beer I had tasted like medicine.
There was an oompah band who when played got a cheer and loads of people got up top take photos.
And yes they do wear funny hats here with feathers in!!!

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Don't you love the Chinese. This is a Del boy job

Changing location

People !!

I am leaving Amsterdam tonight and moving to Munich.
I am looking forward to the Bradworst and swine and the Oktober Bier Fest
Stories will come about how I settle down or not.

Already finding differences i.e. they want more money than the fucking Dutch from me.
to get an apartment it's 1.5 weeks rent as a deposit plus agents fee of one month etc


Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Expect Ferdinand to end England career

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/england/8382131/England-manager-Fabio-Capello-prepares-to-restore-John-Terry-in-place-of-Rio-Ferdinand-to-the-captaincy-for-good.html

Capello fucks up again.
He has done the same as he did with Beckham.
He is a tosser and it proves he cannot handle people.
Capello's No.2 tells Ferdinand on Sunday that his Captaincy is safe and then on Monday he hears via the press that Capello is giving it back to John Terry.
Never trust an Italian!!!

So I expect Ferdinand to retire from National football in order to prolong his playing career at Man U

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Sunday Frustration

My youngest son was in his first soccer final.
They lost 2-0 and could have won if the the fucking Manager had any tactical sense!
My son who commands the midfield was moved back to right back and then he brought on players who are not very good to be a fair manager.
Then he moves the whole team around.
The defense was shit and then doesn't tell the boys who to mark or how to mark.
Up and until now the team has been carrying the manager, but they need inspiration.
I hope something happens before the next final on 3/4/2011

Crossing the border!!!!

http://mail.google.com/mail/?hl=en&shva=1#inbox/12eadf207b386176

Friday, March 11, 2011

Busy,Busy,Busy!!

Tomorrow morning Football training run
Tomorrow 4-30pm - 9pm Masons
Sunday morning 8am-1pm Youngest son has his first Cup Final
Sunday afternoon watch football
Sunday early evening rest
Monday at 4am up for work !!!

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Arsenal are no match


Arsenal lost to Barcelona last night. I am not sure what people expect as it happens time and again. Barcelona at home 100,000 supporters and nearly all decisions go Barcelona way! It was obvious an Arsenal player was going to get sent off with all of the acting the Barca players were doing.Van Persie was the prime suspect after a fracas.
Apart from that Nasri was played off the field, Bendtner did naff all and couldn't even control his first touch.Arshavin only played in the last 18 minutes. Goalkeeper went off with damaged hand tendons. Basically NO HOPE!!
Go on you SPURS!!!

English lesson for a 5 year old !!

Borat is tackled by football player

A guy runs across a football filed in his Borat style swimwear.
A player tackles him and everyone applauded.
Except the Ref!!
He sent the player off for violent conduct.

What an absolute plank!
The Ref should now go before a disciplinary committee and sacked. - Tosser!

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3454878/I-was-sent-off-for-tackling-streaker-and-then-streakers-tackle-got-banned-too.html

OMG don't do anything to save the Earth

BBC's new face of religion claims Eve has been 'unfairly maligned as the troublesome wife'


This stinks of:

Someone trying to be argumentative
Someone earning a huge salary
BBC fucking up again!!
Some PC and wimmins rights claim

You have a religious programme hosted by  non-believer!!!
What the fuck is going on.

The BBC are very near to being disbanded.
They can't raise the license fees for their expenses, so now they are putting on cheap rubbish to fill the holes.
On top of that she is Greek who can never be trusted anyway!!!



======================================================================

The BBC's new face of religion is an atheist who claims that God had a wife and Eve was "unfairly maligned" by sexist scholars.


BBC's new face of religion claims Eve has been 'unfairly maligned as the troublesome wife'
Dr Francesca Stavrakopoulou has been given a primetime BBC Two series, The Bible's Buried Secrets, in which she makes a number of startling suggestions.
She argues in the programme that Eve was not responsible for the Fall of Man and was not even the first woman, as the story of the Garden of Eden did not belong in the first book of the Old Testament.
"Eve, particularly in the Christian tradition, has been very unfairly maligned as the troublesome wife who brought about the Fall," Dr Stavrakopoulou said. "Don't forget that the biblical writers are male and it's a very male-dominated world. Women were second-class citizens, seen as property."
The idea that God had a wife is based on Biblical texts that refer to "asherah". According to Dr Stavrakopoulou, Asherah was the name of a fertility goddess in lands now covered by modern-day Syria, and was half of a "divine pair" with God.
Dr Stavrakopoulou is a senior lecturer in the Hebrew Bible at the University of Exeter, and gained a doctorate in theology from Oxford. Born in London to an English mother and Greek father, Dr Stavrakopoulou was raised "in no particular religion" and does not believe in God.
"I'm an atheist with a huge respect for religion, not just ancient religions but modern religions too," she told Radio Times. "As a biblical scholar, I see what I do as an academic discipline, a branch of history like any other. And, as an academic, I think you leave faith at the door.
"I'm aware that there are some who find it hard to understand why an atheist could possibly be interested in the Bible, and I think that does a massive disservice to a fantastic collection of ancient texts. The Bible is a work of religious and social literature that has a huge impact on Western culture, and for that reason it's important that programmes like these are made."
She added: "There are still scholars today who assert that the Bible ought t be our primary reference for understanding the past. I completely disagree. I don't think you can use the Bible as a reliable historical source."
Dr Stavrakopoulou said she had battled sexism in her field. "Most biblical scholars are middle-aged, bearded men. It's fair to say there's been an amount of sexism in the discipline and, as a young woman in the field, I've had to develop my own ways of coping with that."
The BBC's religious output is overseen by Aaqil Ahmed, head of religion and ethics, whose appointment in 2009 prompted complaints from viewers who believed that the role should not have been given to a Muslim.

Monday, March 7, 2011

Fergie is apologetic again!

Getting a paedophile billionaire to pay Stg 15,000 of her Stg 5 million debt via her ex-husband, has again caused Sarah Ferguson to say she had a serious error of judgement!!

How many times have she said sorry and how many times are we to feel sorry for her.
She is desperate and why?
She still thinks she is Royalty and behaves in such a way that she spends, spends, spends!
No one cares about her anymore.
Her daughters should be looked after by Prince Andrew, so she can get a bloody job, after all she is a commoner.
The Queen should really pay her off and then advertise that she is cut off from the Royal family and her husband.
Then  she can find another billionaire to suck her toes while lying in the sun!!

Again the judges are the criminals when it comes to the mad mullahs

A mad mullah from Pakisatn sets fire to poppies during a Armistice day remembrance and calls for 'Death to the infidels'.
As I mentioned a couple of weeks ago, he would be let off.

The bastard got a Stg50 fine because he is claiming Stg 800 a month benefits from the Infidels he wants dead.
If I was the government I would ship him straight back on a PIA flight and then let him preach it all from a shack in Karachi.

Where is the sense of these judges in the UK.
They are total wankers who really are detached from reality

The person who burnt the Quran was whacked heavily, because it offended the Muslims and mad mullahs.
Oh what a shame!

The modern day crusade is gathering pace!!
I can see the British National Front or the English Defense League gathering more supporters.

Freeloader Prince Andrew

This guy is a sleezebag. However, the Royal family still bring in billions of pounds a year in trade and this needs to be remembered !
Prince Andrew goes golf using a helicopter. Why not he flies them.
Prince Andrew gets a billionaire to pay Fergies Stg 15,000 debt when she owes Stg 5mio.
You see Andrew is a front man, like Branson and never uses his own money!!
I am sure Andrew is still knocking off Fergie. Maybe he likes her toes as well!
Andrew jets off everywhere and uses peoples villas for free.
Andrew has very dubious friends.
Andrew has very rich friends in industry.
Don't they all slap each other on the back after helping each other.
Seems that Andrew has been having young girls.
What I find hard to understand is how comes billionaire has a 17 year old Masseuse.
What kind did she give, because it takes a few years to get to know someone's body parts, unless you are an expert in just a small part of it!!!
His valet takes  6 foot ironing board to press his trousers, that means his trousers go over his head, doesn't it??
Anyway, he has a luxurious life at our expense, but still brings in the cash as he is a weasel.
He will of course fall down soon and his parasite life will come to a grind.
His brother Edward has been caught doing the same, except he brought in nothing of value.

Don't take these 2 parasites as an example of the Royal Family.
They really do generate large amount of trade for the UK.

Silver Slickers


Every day because we are boring gits, we go for a walk to the local shopping centre.
It doesn't seem to matter what time we go, there always appears to be a load of old gits going around in the electric motors doing wheelies in the centre which is an enclosed shopping area.
These old gits are the Silver Slickers.
There must be loads of homes nearby to the office, cos it seems everyday one group are released to go wild!
The reason I am moaning is because the old gits always want to stand and talk to the cashiers and it takes me an age to get anywhere.
If I end up like these in 10-15 years, can someone please shoot me!!!

Friday, March 4, 2011

America screw up again in Pakistan

Once again the yanks have fucked up in a covert operation.
I have mentioned several times how they landed on the wrong beaches in the Second World War or their intelligence got it wrong again like Grenada, Vietnam etc, etc.

Now in Pakistan they screw up what appears to be another covert operation and then try and cover it up by using the Geneva convention for diplomats.
Now this guy goes to Pakistan and gets caught in an operation of some kind, under interrogation he admits he is there for the CIA. Then Obama says that he should have Diplomatic Immunity.
So is it that he was on a secret mission to Pakistan (which isn't allowed) or was it that he was a government agent in the Embassy in Pakistan.
Either way it's a fuck up.

Of course it's not one way.
In Pakistan they have Mad Mullahs going around training people to kill Americans and all infidels.
They harbour Al Qaeda in the hills
Taliban was established in Pakistan


What does Pakistan get?
Funding from the USA for getting rid of Al Qaeda, which they won't because the funding stops.
The USA threaten to cut the aid because their boys are getting caught.
The UN does nothing eventhough they won't recognize the Geneva Convention which they cry for their diplomats

So it's all very confusing.

Just one single fact. The yanks have fucked up again!!!!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

£5m Olympic-size pool built two inches short


A new £5 million 'Olympic-size' swimming pool in Portsmouth has been built two inches too short for international competition.
The eight-lane pool at Mountbatten Leisure Centre is 50 metres in length but international standard pools need to have an extra two inches so that touch-sensitive time boards can be installed.
The Liberal Democrat council in charge of the project have denied that they have blundered in the construction of the pool but opponents say the decision could cost the city millions as it had been earmarked as a training venue for London 2012 athletes. 
"The way it was sold to us was we would be hosting an Olympic team of swimmers for training for the 2012 games," said Tory councillor Donna Jones.
"But now we're being told the pool is two inches too short and as a result the city will lose millions of pounds of revenue along with cash grants.
"The amateurs will be happy with the pool but not top-level athletes."
Another Tory councillor Jim Fleming added: "It's a mistake. It's not long enough to meet Olympic standards.
"It was a council mix-up, a failure to deliver, and the cabinet should admit it and apologise to the city."
However, Lib Dem councillor Lee Hunt said that athletes can still use a stop-watch when training and that councillors were perfectly aware of what they were voting for.
"It was never to be used for the Olympics. It can be used for training and competitions," he said.
"It was developed with national sporting bodies and we were aware of this when voting."

Observations:
Must have been the council cutbacks!
Must have employed a load of builders who don't speak or read English!!
The council are not likely to admit their error if they don't get the Olympic training
The disappointment is amazing when you are 2 inches too short!!!!